The Upstate Life
The Upstate Life

Monday, April 24, 2006
The verizOn C

Last week's episode of The OC pissed off The Upstate Life in a way that essentially made the show sink to a new low. No, it wasn't because of Kirsten's alcoholic relapse (though her wine-chugging abilities are rather impressive), or the reemergence of Anna Stern and her incredibly hideous hairstyle. It was a corporate tie-in to a wireless cell phone provider that was shoved right down the viewer's throat. I've always been opposed to product placement, even in its most subtle forms. I don't need to be reminded that Sprint makes phones with apparently everlasting battery life (even though we all know Bauer's PDA would've died by hour three with all that uploading, either that or trying to find a signal in order to latch onto their horrible network).

Anyway, Samaire Armstrong's character informs Cohen that his now long-forgotten comic Atomic County has been turned into a VCast. Cohen replies with a blank stare, "What's a VCast?" The camera then shoots to Anna's Verizon Wireless-embezzled phone displaying Atomic County in its entire glorious wireless format for at least a solid five seconds. Had my coffee table not been constructed of glass, I would have gladly smashed my head into it. First off, you're a fucking liar Cohen. You know exactly what VCast is. I mean, you own an iMac, not an eMachine. You're not that inept to not know what this useless, bizarre new technology is. Secondly, Verizon advertises this shit at least between each commercial break of any television programming, and since you're such the pop culture aficionado with your quips and all, I'm sure you've seen at least two ads while watching your precious anime on Cartoon Network. The bottom line is that any person, whether emo-core or my mom, are hands down going to at least heard of VCast. Summer soooo deserves better than you and your smug ass Cohen.

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